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I am a fool. I should have never never never agreed to step out with you. I had a chance when we realized the connection, I pulled back. You notice and begged for me to continue. We did. We were married to others, thinking we could make each other's challenged lives better. We did for a short while. I can't handle these new emotions. Having had you and now lost you is worse than the emotions I was feeling before you. I know...You don't care. I am of no concern for you, that is apparent. I failed to put into us while we were together. I think that if I did, you would have been more fulfilled and we would still be going along our way. But since you didn't get what you were looking for your frustration with life/marriage continued. I would trade away my memories of you. Today, right now, it is too painful to think of you. I need to stay where I am. Yes we have different views on this, but I stick to mine. My mean too much, and I will give up some of my life's happiness to give them a better foundation. I lived the other side and I am making sure my don't. I am sorry, I must let go of my feelings for you...somehow, I must. Not sure why I am sorry, again the fool for caring about someone who doesn't. I can see that my emotions do not match yours. Go ahead, laugh away. In the beginning you said you needed me, begged me to be with you. At the end I wasn't worth an explanation. A simple conversation. Nope, you delete your account and leave me to wonder; with the only way to reach you being a violation of your trust. Call me a fool, but I will not do that. You shut the door... Better to have never loved at all.

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